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Thomas Jane

the Boys are Back in Town

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friends and fans and family... I'm back! After a long days journey into the DARK COUNTRY, after the marathon sprint of HUNG, after the hyper sleep out of the BAD PLANET, after taking (and missing) my KILLSHOT and Chronicling my fight with the Mutants, and after giving a whole lot of Hell to MALONE - i finally, thankfully return to the one place i can call home, here with my brothers and sisters, at the baddest of the Bad, the darkest of the Dark, the killest of the Kill, the hellest of the HELL, the one and only --- RAW STUDIOS.

 

how the hell are ya!

 

What have i missed? Nary a day goes by where someone doesn't yell across the street that i dodged a bullet with P2; dare I say i kinda knew that already, but it's nice to hear.

KILLSHOT gets a lot of favor with the few folks who have actually seen it (Weinsteins, what were you thinking?) and i actually got pretty decent reviews for my work in it. which feels good.

 

I finally wrapped up the first season of HUNG just a few days ago, flew back from doing exteriors in Detroit, fucking cool as hell city, great people and totally undogged by the fact that the beating heart of America is being totally ignored and wrongfully maligned. great food, great music, pretty girls and beautiful souls reside there. it's always a pleasure to stay at the Townsend Hotel, in Clint's old room from when he was shooting El Camino. I mean GRAN TORINO! i did set the trashcan on fire from a hastily tossed cigar butt outside the building, but the diligent doormen took care of it post haste, and saved me from being front page news in the Detroit Tattler. thank you, doormen of the world! least it gave them something to tell their wives that night.

 

i'm looking forward to COMICON this year, who's going with me? i haven't had ANY time to get the papers in order, but the cool folks at the Con are helping me out wit dat. we're gonna have some fun. i've got BOTH graphic novels printed up and shipped over across the pond, ALIEN PIG FARM, and BAD PLANET. Timmy and our pal JASON HANLEY got that squared away and looking FINE, with a little help from our friend, MARSHALL DILLON, our knight in shining armor. we'll be selling those bad boys at the booth, and i'll also have a beautiful sculpt of one of our DEATHSOLDIERS from DEVILS COMMANDOS - done up nice and pretty by none other that JOHN WRIGHTSON, son of BERNIE, who did the character designs for us. TODD FARMER is chained to the typewriter as we speak, putting the finishing touches on the screenplay. we hope to get that devil to ride by the beginning of 2010.

 

busy? nahh. we're fucking riding bareback on the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, baby!

 

RAW STUDIOS is planning a big worldwide takeover in the months to come, and YOU GUYS can say you were part of the OG. remember that, when we start our own MEMBERS ONLY section for the OG members that stuck with us through the hard times, the thin times, the bootstrap times of everlovin' joy.

 

SO looks like the old HUNG is going to be BIG, har de har har har, and we might just attract us some whaddayacallit RIFFRAFF. To these dirty unwashed i sez, WELCOME! better late then sorry, or however the saying goes - we're happy to see ya.

 

but i'm really happy to check in and say hiya to YOU, the OG Raw members who stuck around, even after there was nothin to talk about once the old P2 crawled back into the trashcan it crawled outta.

 

so howdy.

announce yourself!

tell me i'm a jerk, tell me what's been goin on wit ya. we won't kick you out. unless of course you talk shit about my wife - that shit won't float! (remember THAT?)

Bring on the dick jokes. just make sure their funny. remember, i have already heard them all, so if dey ain't that funny, keep 'em in yer pants.

ahh, it's good to be back.

TJ !

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Welcome back TJ,

 

It's always great to have you back and it's really cool to see you refreshed, joyful and kicking ass, as always.

We really have to thank wholeheartedly *the great doormen who saved you from being front page in Detroit tattler !* .

Nice story ! ;)

It's been really wonderful seeing you.

Keep up the good work and take care. :)

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TOM! Just noticing yesterday that you hand't posted since December. Welcome back.

 

Got to see Killshot and was thoroughly impressed. Great role for you and what a cast to share a film with! I loved it!!! No idea why there were so many issues with it's release.

 

As one of the "give the damned thing a chance proponents" of War Zone let me be the first to say here that you dodged a HUGE fucking bullet. Total garbage. The initial reviews were so horrid I waited until DVD to watch it...and could have waited longer. Why oh why did they not involve you in the creative process?

 

Very much looking forward to Dark Country. Watched Chris Browning's talents get flushed down the toilet in T4 so that Bale could chew up more scenery. Here's hoping to see more of him in DC. Another damn fine cast there.

 

Also looking forward to finally getting my grubby mitts on APF3K!!!

 

Working on all sorts of stuff on my end. Texas film incentives just got amazing so work is starting to pour in. Had a very promising reading today. Met a filmmaker out my way and we now have 3 shorts, a web serial and a feature in the works. The feature is a project my wife and I came up with the idea for and she put to paper. Got it back from a pro reader the other day with only minor adjustments and a very good overall review. More to come as it solidifies. Hopefully someday soon I can hang up the fucking day job and make enough money on film to put food on the table. If I can just do that, I'll consider myself successful.

 

Again man, welcome back. You coming back to Dallas anytime soon?

 

Fred

 

 

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Punisher: War Zone did worse than Howard the Duck, dodging a bullet is kind of an understatement. Though at least Stevenson seems to be getting steady work from it.

 

Can't wait to see Give 'em Hell, Malone.

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Hopefully someday soon I can hang up the fucking day job and make enough money on film to put food on the table. If I can just do that, I'll consider myself successful.

 

Fred

 

that's what it's all about my friend. that indeed is the true measure of success - doing what you love and being able to make a living at it, so that that's all you do. day and night. we don't do this for the money. we do it because we love it. that's all she wrote!

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Welcome back Mr Jane.

 

Looking forward to Give 'em Hell, Malone. Ain't seen any good noir recently.

 

Also holding out for Dark Country. Good cast, plot and its in 3-d, delicious.

 

Cheers,

 

MuseDawg

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Guest AdminGuyX

Holy fucking shit. Tom kicks the door in just to say hello.

 

Nice to have you back and in good spirits!!

 

Hey, I know that Marshall guy. He's saved my ass a few times too.

 

I don't know any dick jokes. They are all new to me.

 

Whatcha' got?

 

 

 

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Hey, Thomas!! Welcome back! How ya been?!

 

Been busy as hell, have you? Ain't it great to have a job!! :lol: Missed you around here. It's great to have you back and looking forward to hearing all about your adventures of the past few months.

You've given all of us RAW fans a LOT to look forward to in the months ahead.

 

I really wish I could go to the Comicon this year. I've never been to one, but it seems like it would be a helluva lotta fun.

 

Anybody know the deets on Comicon? When exactly the dates are? And when are you gonna be there, Thomas? I might see if I can squeeze in a side trip to SD before I leave the Golden State. :P

 

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There was that one from AICN; "Tom Jane prepares to become a different type of Punisher".

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First off welcome back my friend! missed you not being here. Again I so cant wait to see the new films and Hung Sir!

 

My self just been a working and trying to work on my paintings and cars.

 

Ok for the dick Jokes:!

 

3 guys go camping in their new tent.

 

After a night's sleep, the guy sleeping on the left of the tent wakes up in a cold sweat and tells the others "I had the most horrible nightmare that somebody was trying to pull my dick off!"

 

The guy sleeping on the right says "Weird! I had the exact same dream!"

 

The guy sleeping in the middle says "I had a dream that I was skiing ..."

 

 

Again Congrats on all the Work! Im so glad things are goin great with your Life.

 

Oh if any one dose say anything about your famliy sir. As I told Mr. Bradstreet. You guys know where two big Texas boys are that can help with any of those type of problems for you :)

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Tom always a pleasure to hear from you. By the way, if your in Detroit to shoot another season of HUNG, contact me man! I'd love to show you around and become friends. I'll buy ya dinner buddy. If I may say so, Bradstreet, O'Brien, Mark Walters, Noeland, Irish, and myself had a great time here in Detroit at the Comic Con!

 

Hope all is going well with you man, you seem happy and that's fuckin wondeful to hear brother.

 

Aright my joke now.....

 

A man is on his honeymoon in Jamaica with his new wife Wendy. The guy has to pee while he is at the pool with his new wife. So he goes to the bathroom and he is at a urinal and at the next urinal is a huge Jamaican dude and he cant resist looking at the guys dick.

 

He notices that the Jamaican has "WENDY" tattooed on his dick and says "Hey man I have the same tattoo on my dick as you, do you have a girlfriend named Wendy?"

 

The Jamaican guy goes "No Mon, mine says 'Welcome to Jamaica Mon. I hope you have a nice day"

 

-Raffi

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Yo TJ,

 

It is wonderful to have you back home! I wondered if you'd grown tired of the online posting thing, but realize that you've just been extremely busy.

 

Sounds like you've been working on a lot over the last 6 months - a lot of interesting new projects no doubt that we can't wait to watch! Wish we could go to Comic Con, not because I'm a comic fan, but because I'm a TJ fan, nevertheless am in the UK at the mo and with the schedule I have ahead for the next 3 months, I'm shackled to the crown :-) When are you coming to London again?

 

I'm wondering if you're working on anything new for Frighten the Horses. Just listening to Girl in the Woods at the mo and wondering if we can be expecting more of the same soon. Was also wondering if you write your own stuff? I've been playing piano since I was 4 and have been composing since I was 13, but then you grow up and get a job, and you end up never having time to do the things you really want to. I have a piano now, but haven't properly touched it in about 2 years :-( the creativity also rusts with time - the music just use to flow out impromptu without it ever being practiced but the "musical anointing" has gone dry.

 

You're music has sort of a "tortured soul" feel to it, and I get it. I think you were a lonesome cowboy in a previous life :-) anyway....love the stuff!

 

Speak Soon

A xx

 

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Noice! Still waiting for Killshot (pre-ordered it on Blu-Ray a looooong time ago) hopefully it's going to kick arse.

 

Dick jokes? I only have a dick that's a joke.

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Ahoy TJ!

 

I saw a Nic Cage move called 'Red Rock West' yesterday. It reminded me a bit of 'U-Turn' (without the Oliver Stone editing), but watching it made me really looking forward to Dark Country, as I hope it's in the vein of those flicks. :)

 

Been watching the teasers on the HUNG facebook group and I'm so thrilled to see Jane Adams in it as I'm a fan of the movie Happiness. Hopefully it will become a big hit in the US and therefore sold to Norway later on.

 

I really liked Killshot and especially Joseph Gordon-Levitt. But what I liked most about it is that it's got a 90s thriller feel and look to it. If a movie like Angels & Demons get a wide release, this one should have had as well. Though I understand it had been re-edited and stuff.

 

And lastly... Malone! Really looking forward to that one. Without any comparison other than usage of hats, hopefully Malone will blow Public Enemies out of the water.

 

Hope all is well! :)

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Welcome back, TJ!

 

Great to hear that things are going well and I'm very looking forward to DARK COUNTRY and MALONE. I got THURSDAY and STANDER on DVD last month and watched them for the first time (shame on me :P )... good stuff!

 

I would like to attend COMIC CON, it's a little difficult for me because of the travelling, but maybe next year...

 

In the Mutant Chronicles thread you mentioned working on an adaptation of VULTURES by REH. You mean The Vultures of Whapeton, right? That's cool. I gotta read it again soon:

http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Vultures_of_Whapeton

 

I'm pretty busy writing fantasy and sci fi short stories for different anthologies, want to start with my first novel sometime this year :P

 

By the way, did you see the first Jonah Hex set pics? What do you think? :)

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Glad you're back TJ. Take a breathe while you can. I've got a feeling that after Sunday you'll be back to shooting the curl.

Got a viewing party all lined up for the debut. Margarita's, BBQ & HUNG. Who'd ever thought we'd be anxiously waiting for Sunday night?

 

As for porksword anecdotes, the traditional Italian toast, "Cin Cin"(roughly "to your health" and pronounced "Chin-Chin") means "Penis, Penis" in Japanese. I think that might be an appropriate RAW toast!

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Welcome back Tom! Glad to see your still firing on all cylinders. From reading your post, you've been more than a bit busy. Can't wait to see what you all have in store for us.

 

Great job on Killshot and MC. Loved them both, and the more I see of Hung, I'm glad it's only less than a week away. Cheers Sir!

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Umm...Welcome.....back ?.... I guess? It feels weird saying that becuase I'm new to this place.I feel like a guest who dosen't "live" here but I'm acting like I do or something.Eh but...I guess it's whatever. Well welcome back anyways :D.

 

Wow, you know, when you put all the stuff you've been working on in one whole post, it's much easier to tell how super hella foochin' busy you've been over the time you were gone. That's good that you got a break now eh? :) It would be nice for me to go to Comic-Con....or any interesting con in general but sadly I have no money. Oh well.

 

Hmmm... a dick joke?..... nope sorry I don't have any dick jokes. Not any funny ones anyway he he.

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Welcome back, TJ!

 

Glad that you've been quite busy, but also glad that you're back around!

 

This is YOUR home, after all, so thanks to you and Tim for letting me stick around! :)

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two black guys pissing off a bridge. first guy sez, "man this waters cold!"

second guy sez, " yeah and it's deep, too!"

A third guy yells from across the river,

"Hey! you mofo's want to get the hell off my dick?

i'm trying to take a leak here!"

 

"my dick's so big i caught a homeless family living under it."

 

come on, people! best dick joke heard here i'm gonna tell on the next talk show i do.

 

T

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Two girls are walking through the streets of Scotland when they come upon a drunk passed out in a kilt. The one dares the other to see if he's wearing anything under his fancy plaid beauty and lo-and-behold he is hanging out in all his glory. So the girl that looks bets the other girl won't touch it. She proudly declares back "Not only will I touch it, but I'l tie this ribbon around it." With great giggling she does both deeds and they scurry off as the drunk comes too.

 

The guy looks under his kilt, sees the ribbon and says "Well... I don't know where I've been, but I won first prize".

 

****

 

A rancher has a horrible problem with a crying horse. He seeks out a horsewhisperer and has they guy come out to take a look. After arriving on the scene the horse speaker says "This should be easy". He walks up and whispers in the horses ear and the horse immediately begins laughing.

 

The rancher is ecstatic...but as he starts to thinking... he guesses its a fluke, so he says "If you can make him laugh, surely you can make him cry again." "Is that what you really want?" asks the whisperer. With a nod from the rancher the whisperer stand proudly before the horse where the rancher can't see and the horse begins to cry.

 

"HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" the rancher demanded. "First, to get him to laugh I told him I had a bigger dick than he did." "To get him to cry...I proved it."

 

******************

 

"What do you call nuts on the wall?"

"Walnuts"

What do you call nuts in a chest?"

Chestnuts

"What do you call nuts on your chin?"

A dick in your mouth!

 

****************

 

A guy is looking to please his woman with something more exciting than his small member.

He goes to a doctor and gets an experimental surgery to replace his member with a baby elephant trunk.

His wife is floored by their amazing sex.

Later that week they go to dinner at her parents.

While sitting at the table, the guys dick shoots up out of his pants grabs a baked potato and takes it under the table.

The father, missing the blur of what happened keeps a suspicious eye out.

Sure enough it happens a second time.

"Do that again" the father demands.

"I would, but I don't think I have room in my ass for another baked potato.

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I'm too much of a good girl to know any d*ck jokes. :rolleyes:

 

Hmm, maybe I should reconsider my avatar pic?? :lol:

 

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You beat me to it, Doss. The one with the crying horse is funny :P What's the deadline, I mean when is the next talk show? ^^

 

"If I lay it on your shoulder, you can drink ground-water..."

 

"No matter where I go, my dick always gets there first."

 

"My dick was almost drafted by the Cleveland Browns, but Art Modell didn't want a bigger dick than himself."

 

"I was once in Ohio and got a blow job in Tennessee."

 

"My dick is so big, Las Vegas casinos fly it into town for free."

 

"My dick is so big, the city was going to build a statue of it but they ran out of cement."

 

"Just like politicians, it only comes into work when it feels like it."

 

"I can only drive convertibles."

 

"I can drive alone and still use the carpool lane."

 

"No dick is as hard as life."

 

Hahaha. But enough with the one-liners:

 

A reporter asks a woman: "What do you think about condoms?"

She says: "Well, it depends on what's in it for me."

 

A blind rabbit meets a blind crocodile.

They greet each other and the crocodile touches the rabbit: "Soft fur, long ears... you have to be a rabbit!"

The rabbit goes: "Yes, that's right."

Then the rabbit touches the crocodile: "Hmm... short legs, big mouth, long dick - you have to be an Italian."

 

A salesman and a farmer sit in a bar. The salesman laments: "Man, I got problems. Nobody buys a tractor."

The farmer counters: "That's what you call problems? Yesterday I wanted to milk our cow. It knocked me on the head with it's dong, so I tied it up. Before I could continue milking it hit me with it's left hoof, so I tied it to a stake. Before I could sit down again, it hit me with it's right hoof. I tied it to another stake. I got so warmed up doing this, I took my shirt off. And in that moment, my wife came in... Now, if you can convince my wife that I just wanted to milk the cow, I'll buy one of your damn tractors!"

(Not really a dick joke, huh? Damn, but maybe it made you laugh anyway ^^)

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Hmm, maybe I should reconsider my avatar pic?? :lol:

Dear, I've been wondering about that pic ever since you joined!!! :D

 

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